Fish Tales

Upon an outing the other day, one heard a story so disturbingly alarming, yet hilarious: He-Who-Observes just had to share.

Four friends were sat around a table in a bar, chatting, catching up and soaking the others tales and tribulations of the previous week. Eaves dropping to the max, a tip of cleaning out ones Goldfish arose...

"How's Ainsley?" One friend asked, in a banter-esque tone. It is later apparent Ainsley is the fish.

"Oh, you haven't heard? I have grave news my friends, very grave news indeed" The owner announced. "I killed Ainsley"

Gasps arose from around the table. It would appear Ainsley had a bit of a fan club...

"How?!"

"Why?!"

"Poor Ainsley incurred a horrible death. I was cleaning him out, it'd been a while and his water wasn't looking as fresh as one would hope. So, I scooped Ainsley into the net and placed him in our utility sink. Carried on washing the bowl in the kitchen sink and making sure everything was perfectly spotless for him..."

The tone of care could be detected in her voice.

"When I returned to the utility sink to scoop him out, he didn't look right, but I thought 'sometimes this is just because of the sudden water change from room temperature to cool', and ignored his emotions..."

The table was tense, hanging off her every word...

"As the afternoon passed, I noticed he just wasn't looking himself. I left for the shops and returned a few hours later, and there his was, white as a sheet and foaming at the surface of the bowl..."

"Oh my god!" A friend exclaimed.

"Well, I waiting until my housemate returned home and told her the news. After describing and re-enacting my actions of cleaning him out, my housemate screamed, and then giggled... She'd only gone and bleached the utility sink that morning! I had bleached Ainsley to death!"

Screams of shock and laughter came from the table, the RSPCA would have shivered.

"Its OK though, I was given a free fish on the back of my food shop receipt so Im picking one up tomorrow"

The topic was completed and changed in a milli second.

Life on the back of a coupon? So 2010.